Hunchblack
League Member
(Cue dramatic generic film trailer music...)
(Cue for generic film trailer action movie drum beat)
(Hunchblack dressed in a Batman costume. He lets out a faint whimper as his costume is ripped and his hump bursts through the back)
Hunchblack: I thought you said I was size XL?
(Hunchblack puts his finger in an open socket, and collapses on the floor in an orgy of electrocution)
(A single frame of a porno scene flashes over the screen... I’m going to pretend I don’t know the names of any porn movies)
(Hunchblack wearing reading glasses, reading a copy of ‘The Great Gatsby’)
Hunchblack: Has anyone seen my fungal foot powder?
'Friends of Hunchblack' Copyright 2007
Film Trailer Guy (V.O.):
...
In a world that demands perfection...
...One man dares to look the world in the eye...
...With his good eye...
...And say...
...’Hey look at me, I have a freakin hump on my back’...
...
In a world that demands perfection...
...One man dares to look the world in the eye...
...With his good eye...
...And say...
...’Hey look at me, I have a freakin hump on my back’...
(Cue for generic film trailer action movie drum beat)
THIS SUMMER
THE WORLD WILL RECOIL IN HORROR
BUT BE FIXATED WITH FASCINATION
...AS THEY CHEER A NEW HERO
THE WORLD WILL RECOIL IN HORROR
BUT BE FIXATED WITH FASCINATION
...AS THEY CHEER A NEW HERO
(Hunchblack dressed in a Batman costume. He lets out a faint whimper as his costume is ripped and his hump bursts through the back)
Hunchblack: I thought you said I was size XL?
Film Trailer Guy (V.O.):
...A MAN AS ELECTRIFYING
(Hunchblack puts his finger in an open socket, and collapses on the floor in an orgy of electrocution)
...AS EXCITING
(A single frame of a porno scene flashes over the screen... I’m going to pretend I don’t know the names of any porn movies)
...AS FREAKISH
(Hunchblack wearing reading glasses, reading a copy of ‘The Great Gatsby’)
...AS CULTURED
Hunchblack: Has anyone seen my fungal foot powder?
Film Trailer Guy:
...AS YOU WILL EVER SEE IN DECENT SOCIETY...
...
...
...
...WELL...
...
...AS YOU WILL EVER SEE IN NFW...
...
...
...
...WELL...
...
...AS YOU WILL EVER SEE IN NFW...
HUNCHBLACK
Hunchblack (reading from a card): I have a hunch I'm going to fit right in...
(Hunchblack drops the card and looks off camera)
Hunchblack: I'm not saying that.
(Generic arrival advertisement paid for by ‘Friends of Hunchblack’)
'Friends of Hunchblack' Copyright 2007
