FADEIN...
We are back on the Williams farm, owned and operated by CLARENCE Williams himself. Last time we were here we encountered NLW newest wrestler, well, zombie, well, what ever the hell he is. We witnessed him eat a pig, which was disgusting because it was raw. Camera pans right, we catch CLARENCE outside leaned against a rusty beat up tractor, overalls, white t-shirt, his favorite apparel. *Across from him though, in plain site is the zombie known as Harry Holocaust, he is tied to a tree it seems in the middle of a field. Clawing at the ground and trying to charge towards the camera crew and CLARENCE, but of course Mr. Williams takes no notice of this.
CLARENCE: "Dat be what I be sayin' too Mr. Eli! I be sayin' its, sayin' its, be sayin' its! I curious too what dis guy 'ere be, like ya said, got dem doc-cue-mints, dat be tellin' dat he be a zombie."
CLARENCE: "Gotta trust dem gov'rnment type folk, ya know? But dat not what dis all 'ere 'bout. Guess you figure dat out by now, sar. I know what cha be dinkin', der ain't no livn' dead type folk, but ya gotta dink outside dat der box, sar."
He shakes his head slightly waving his *hand in the air as Cameras focus on what Harry is doing.
CLARENCE: "I mean jist look at 'em go. He be runnin' 'round like he on sum dem pills, ya know, the type that play wit cha noggin' an' such. I know da feelin' though, how 'xactly ya gonna go fight dat sorta thang."
Harry full sprints to the left only to be yanked to the ground by a chain, he screeches loudly.
CLARENCE: "Ya look like a strong type der, sar, Mr. Eli. But I be sayin' he a bit loose in da upper region, ya know the noodle. Eatin' my pigs, ain't no worries though, I got plenty o' dem pigs."
CLARENCE: "And I be readin', ya know, one dem books, guy gave to me, learn bout dat hole-la-cost, I really don't get it much, but I guess it happen quite bit ago, I don't know, ain't just-if-i-cation for it, but, it is what it is der, sar."
Harry then decides to charge to the right, yanked down again as he painters heavily.
CLARENCE: "I even, ta be honest, when I first say him eat dat der poor Betsy, dat be my horse. Well, was my horse, he ate her, didn't I tell ya dat? Well when I went out der, to see wot all tha' raucous was in da' back, I shot dat man with my gun, he didn't die."
CLARENCE: "I know, I know, sounds bit off, but it truth der, sar. I ain't tell no lies, dat be honest, der, sar. I wouldn' be so pointy though, not ev'rybody be an idiot fo' believin' dat he a zombie."
CLARENCE: "Crazier things people be believin' now days, like dat, well I dunno, just stuff, oh, like dat boy, JFK got shot be some bullets. Somethin' like dat, but, ain't dumb to believe."
A rabbit hops past CLARENCE.
CLARENCE: "I believe my der prize, he can do 'bout anything, and people will like 'em. He a bit out side dat der box, but he a likable type guy. Just like you Mr. Eli, sar. You a bit out der, with ya funny accent and be sayin' thangs like bloke, don't know really wot dat be. I ain't one to be honest, I'm CLARENCE.
CLARENCE: "Now dat we got dem thangs in order 'round 'ere, I dink you outta owe dat der guy an 'pology for hittin' 'em in his head with ya bat. Dat not right Mr. Eli, dat be rude der, sar. And If I be him, I'd be awful sore at ya."
SNAP! The chain that was keeping Harry down has snapped. A bloody vomit to follow.
CLARENCE: "Jist hope ya ain't do that to Harry over der, he don't take likin' to being hit too much sar, get him a bit mad and such."
CLARENCE: "But I do hope fo' da best 'ere Mr. Eli, ya know in ra-gards, to ya getting' in da ring wit dat der zombie, lawrd knows I wouldn' do nut-ing like dat. Ya a brave soul der Mr. Eli, jist keep ya head on straight, and you be good 'ere, so will Harry."
CLARENCE: "Well, wot be left in dat der head of his. Good luck ta ya Mr. Eli, trust me 'ere on dis, Sar, dis ain't gonna be no pony show. Don't let 'em bite ya."
Harry leaps at the rabbit sinking his teeth on it as blood squirts all over, CLARENCE is taken back as the camera crew backpedals fast to get away.
CLARENCE: "Oh Jesus 'ere we ga 'gain!"
FADEOUT.