Tabula Rasa
"Well, that was fun."
(FADEIN...
NFW banner.
Representing home.
Me, in front of it.
No frills or extras.
Go.)
"It's a rare talent, Joey, where you can completely miss the point of what I was saying."
"Then completely miss the same point a second time."
It's a little bit like Waiting for Godot. Nothing happens, then intermission, then nothing happens.
No, it's exactly like it.
"But I congratulate you, Joey - you've made the one thousandth reference to Cameron Cruise since this tournament of sixteen began."
For a man that people always use as an example of 'Terrible? At least I'm not as bad at (insert name of activity here) as Cameron Cruise, he's certainly on the tip of everyone's tongue.
Also, eeew.
"You paved the way for Troy Windham, only to be paid back via teabagging, and then Cameron Cruise chased him out of A1 because he was inferior."
It's the Circle of Life.
"You're as relevant as your work shows, Joey. If you're happy being Mr. Troy or carrying Cameron's bags, then be happy with it. But to give the two of them the boosts you said you gave them, raising them up at your own expense, don't be surprised when you end up tied to their legacies."
Like I already said, you were always the best at this.
"The irony of this match, Joey, is that you don't have to teach me anything."
"I win? Cool. I'm already really good at this, and a win over Joey Melton means a great deal, no matter who would disagree."
Because you're old and your penis doesn't work. Or something.
"I lose? Cool. You're Joey Melton. Like I already said, you're in the midst of a twenty five year long prime of your career, and I don't lose anything in the process."
"But I'd greatly appreciate it if you stopped talking at me like this is the old guard against the new, like you're the aged immortal against the feisty young upstart looking to make a name at the expense of yours."
"That was old and played out when you were the feisty young upstart."
"Here's the thing, Joey. I don't have a particular need to beat you. I don't have an underlying drive or desire to overcome the Goliath of Joey Melton except for my own ego, which never tortures me after losing a battle. Heck, there isn't even anything I can learn from you as it relates to this match."
Anything you could've taught me I already learned the practical applications years ago from someone you're very familiar with. Also, Miss Ivy thinks you should stop bringing her up every time you want to make a poop joke.
"What you should be doing instead of dissecting the path I took to enter this sport and to make it to the semis of the Prodigy Classic, is perhaps work on your wrestling. Work on your speed and stamina and imagination, because the only way you can actually get to the finals is by outdoing me on all three fronts."
"And that's a pretty darn hard thing to do."
"Instead of dissecting the path I took to get here with your own spin on history, maybe you should stop talking and listen for a change?"
Because not only do I know who the Beatles are, but you're coming off even more like Old Man River by complaining about how kids today don't understand what we had to go through.
So I'll talk slowly so it can download more easily to your 14.4 modem.
"I said you were my favorite of the Greensboro Trio. That doesn't mean you had anything to do with my decision to enter this business. That doesn't mean I ever looked at you as anything but a stellar match, every time you wrestled."
"What this is, Joey, is an ice cold dose of reality that I hope will make you realize that, as big as your ego is, this is not about you."
"Your first step toward making a real name for yourself was due to Ray Cornette bungling one of your bookings. Mine was donning a mask to make sure nobody knew who I was - more specifically so nobody knew where I learned my chops - and spending two hours without a time out making forty five thousand in Big Sur, CA, remember my name amidst the drug induced haze of the New Frontier, three years ago."
"While you call yourself a self - made man as if you're the first to attempt it, there are others of us who have also built our name on our own sweat and stubborn natures. While I'm sure you can't see it through your myopic hindsight, the fact that I can look in the mirror and know I never had anything handed to me."
"Naturally, you see the wrestling business in a different light. You see pre-Melton and post-Melton. And while I can't even fake dismissing your career as anything but legendary, it has never had any bearing on mine."
I smell burning, is that your brain trying to shift gears without a clutch?
"The only thing we have in common is our unwavering obsession with being the best."
And you like to drink tea.
"I'm currently on deck for a title shot in both the Empire and the New Frontier, the two greatest promotions running shows today."
"My victories have included legends such as Dan Ryan and Jack 'High Flyer' Harmen."
"I'm one of four men in the Prodigy Classic semi finals, which means my name is seen alongside Hornet, Mike Manson, and Joey Melton."
"And I did it all without a single helping hand."
Can you honestly say the same, mister self - made man?
Don't forget, I'm friends with everyone who knows all your skeletons.
"I think, what you're really afraid of is when your time finally is up... that you really will be forgotten by fall but the most die - hard of wrestling purists. I think, what you're really afraid of is that your time really is up right now, and you've just been waiting for someone with the skills to show it's true."
"When you tell me that I'll never be what you were and what you are to this industry, I think you're just afraid that I already am."
"Have I accomplished, in three years, what it took you twenty five to do? Of course not. But when you look at me, do you see the Joey Melton that could've been - focused on wrestling instead of showmanship, so that when the fans tire of the same old show, there's more options than to be stuck in a tag team for a decade before finding career rejuvination?"
As Mr. Lindsay Troy, or Mrs. Cameron Cruise?
"On one hand you're telling me that the next match is just a phone call away, and on the other, you're telling me Dan Ryan doesn't want you."
Which is it?
"For a wrestler... there's no choice. For a wrestler... if one of the top two promotions in the world didn't want me, I'd go where I was wanted and show the industry all over again that I was the best that the industry ever produced. I'd start at the bottom and become champion after champion after champion, and make so much noise that none of the players in this industry would be able to overlook me again."
What I wouldn't do is hold out until a tournament celebrating your era shows up, just because the Empire didn't want me.
Drama queen, what?
"I've beaten a lot of people in my short career, Joey, and I've been beaten a lot just the same. But it's always been on the path to something greater."
Brock Alyas pinned me soundly and cleanly in my first officially televised match. Where is he now?
"Whether you beat me, get knocked out, find yourself submerged in a trash can full of water, or seranade my girlfriend on the way to the ring, I'm still a fan of Joey Melton."
"I just hope you realize that this is going to be the hardest match you've had in years."
FADE