Fusenshoff
League Member
OOC: This was a segment from Agg 38 that didn't make it in because OpenOffice for Linux sucks. Justin (Stalker) and I worked on it together.
[Stalker heads backstage after his match with Cameron Cruise. At the same time Fusenshoff is being pestered by Kenny Lombardo.]
KL: Excuse me, Fusenshoff. Do you have a few minutes for an interview?
Fusenshoff: Sorry. I have a match tonight I'm preparing for.
KL: Well that's what I'd like to talk to you about. The fans don't really know what to think of you yet. EPW would like to get to know the 'real you'.
Fusenshoff: You can catch me on Oprah. I'm booked for October of 2016.
[Just as Fusenshoff makes his smart remark he cuts the same corner as Stalker. The two bump into each other. It's Fusenshoff's fault because he wasn't looking.]
Stalker: Watch where you're going, moron.
[The two pause and stare at each other. Fusenshoff doesn't appreciate the remark, but chooses to take the high road and shrug it off. Stalker looks ready to throw down right now.]
Fusenshoff: You're right. My bad.
[Fusenshoff turns to leave but Stalker's not ready to let it go.]
Stalker: Good thing the cameras are here. Now the world knows our TV champ is just a little punk. Look at you run like a pansy when there's no referee to save your ass.
[Fusenshoff turns around and looks at Stalker from about eight feet away. He grins and turns again to leave. Stalker persists.]
Stalker: Hey alkie, you didn't earn that gold you carry and I'm gonna prove it sooner than you think. You walk in EPW and give Ryan one of the finest b******* he's had in half a decade and get a TV title shot in your second match. You pin Cameron Cruise and now you think you're hot s***.
[Fusenshoff is still walking away and it's making Stalker even more spiteful. He's used to pissing people off and doing a good job of it. Fuse's nonchalance is really getting his goat. Halfway across the room Stalker shouts at Fusenshoff.]
Stalker: I'LL BREAK YOUR BOTTLE OF BLACKJACK OVER YOUR HEAD YOU SISSY!!!
[Fuse's silhouette fades in the distance as the camera gets a close-up of Stalker fuming.]
DM: That's an interesting turn of events. Apparently you don't get in Stalker's way.
MN: Actually, you don't bump into Stalker then act like your poo doesn't stink afterward. That hoser walks around like he's the Messiah half the time and I'm sick of it too. 'My life's been so hard; now nothing bothers me.' The guy is a punk.
DM: Hoser, eh Mike?
MN: Yeah, that's slang for inbred, self-absorbed Canadian. Stalker's the one taking down World Champions and wreaking havoc on the main event stage. Fusenshoff should grovel at his feet just for talking to him.
DM: You live in a very diluted world Neely.
[Stalker heads backstage after his match with Cameron Cruise. At the same time Fusenshoff is being pestered by Kenny Lombardo.]
KL: Excuse me, Fusenshoff. Do you have a few minutes for an interview?
Fusenshoff: Sorry. I have a match tonight I'm preparing for.
KL: Well that's what I'd like to talk to you about. The fans don't really know what to think of you yet. EPW would like to get to know the 'real you'.
Fusenshoff: You can catch me on Oprah. I'm booked for October of 2016.
[Just as Fusenshoff makes his smart remark he cuts the same corner as Stalker. The two bump into each other. It's Fusenshoff's fault because he wasn't looking.]
Stalker: Watch where you're going, moron.
[The two pause and stare at each other. Fusenshoff doesn't appreciate the remark, but chooses to take the high road and shrug it off. Stalker looks ready to throw down right now.]
Fusenshoff: You're right. My bad.
[Fusenshoff turns to leave but Stalker's not ready to let it go.]
Stalker: Good thing the cameras are here. Now the world knows our TV champ is just a little punk. Look at you run like a pansy when there's no referee to save your ass.
[Fusenshoff turns around and looks at Stalker from about eight feet away. He grins and turns again to leave. Stalker persists.]
Stalker: Hey alkie, you didn't earn that gold you carry and I'm gonna prove it sooner than you think. You walk in EPW and give Ryan one of the finest b******* he's had in half a decade and get a TV title shot in your second match. You pin Cameron Cruise and now you think you're hot s***.
[Fusenshoff is still walking away and it's making Stalker even more spiteful. He's used to pissing people off and doing a good job of it. Fuse's nonchalance is really getting his goat. Halfway across the room Stalker shouts at Fusenshoff.]
Stalker: I'LL BREAK YOUR BOTTLE OF BLACKJACK OVER YOUR HEAD YOU SISSY!!!
[Fuse's silhouette fades in the distance as the camera gets a close-up of Stalker fuming.]
DM: That's an interesting turn of events. Apparently you don't get in Stalker's way.
MN: Actually, you don't bump into Stalker then act like your poo doesn't stink afterward. That hoser walks around like he's the Messiah half the time and I'm sick of it too. 'My life's been so hard; now nothing bothers me.' The guy is a punk.
DM: Hoser, eh Mike?
MN: Yeah, that's slang for inbred, self-absorbed Canadian. Stalker's the one taking down World Champions and wreaking havoc on the main event stage. Fusenshoff should grovel at his feet just for talking to him.
DM: You live in a very diluted world Neely.