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Training Day 101


Jul 31, 2006


Simon Theodore has officially begun training for the CSWA Anniversary Gold Rush competition, dressed in a all white athletic sweatsuit and a white bandana which reads "Nerd's Rule!!" in big bold lettering, he does a few routine stretches before starting his regimen

"Donkey Kong don't got nothin' on me, buddy..." says Simon squeezing a Pepsi can with his barehands cutting himself, "Owwie..." Simon yelps in pain quickly covering the wound with his mouth.

Olivia standing nearby quickly pulls out the first aid kit, "Glad I brought this along, I know you would need it..."

"Shut up, I'm manliness personfied, I don't need any stinking band-aids... I'm just as tough as anybody on the CSWA roster... " says Simon flexing his skinny Ethiopian like arms in at attempt at flashing biceps quickly drops to the floor to attempt, notice the emphasis on the word attempt, to do a few push ups in hopes of erasing any misconception about Simon Theodore's geeky attributes.

"ONE... TWO..." says Simon obviously out of breathe with his cream colored skin turning almost ruby red.

"No, honey... That's one, you have to go ALL the way down..."

Getting up from the floor Simon looks at his watch.


"Man, all this training has me exhausted, time for a break..."

The expression on Olivia's face said what words wouldn't allow her as she chucked to herself.

"What? I deserve it... a whole four minutes of cardiovascular acitivies.. I'm pooped."

Olivia couldn't argue with Simon who wasn't even an official CSWA superstar yet, and had already grown into the egotistical ways of many stars past and present. It's not even as if he cared about being "CHAMPION," he just wanted the recognition that brain will always outmatch braun even inside the squared circle.

Simon takes a short break, but doesn't stray away from the mission at hand as he begins to speak on Troy Windham and the vast competition that doesn't exist as far as he's concerned.

"You know Troy... You can be as bad as you want to be, but when it comes down to it... your NOT as tough as you potray yourself to be... Hell, I've enountered viruses on my compuiter a lot tougher than you."

...Simon pauses...

"There is one thing that seems to puzzle even the most complex if intellects and that is why do the fans even like you? Your a disgrace, but I have come to this conclusion I'll never be able to understand this society and the way it works, but it's much similar to scratching your balls and sniffing your fingers... You know it's repulsive, BUT... you do it anyway..."

Laughing at his comment, he focuses on the rest of the CSWA competion, because of course to make it to Troy Windham, Theodore would have to defeat many other combatants to even deserve the right.

"Speaking of BALLS, that leads me to address the next scolded dog come back to make alittle name for himself... "

"Kevin Watson... You washed up hansneverbeen of a man, you don't fool me... complaining the CSWA is forcing you to work and Anniversary brings you back. You never amounted to anything in sorry pathetic existence and social security is reaching it's max so here you come running back..."

"Hoping for ONE MORE SHOT... at superstardom... HA! You say you made it on sheer ability and raw talent? WHAT ABILITY... WHAT TALENT..." Simon's anger builds as he speaks and his voice begins to crack.

"You made a career out of jobbing... everywhere you went to road the coattails of another in hopes of success, but did it ever happen? I believe not. What glory have you ever recieved? Are you a 1977 REIIIIIGNING RIVERDALE HIGH SPELLING BE CHAMPIIOOOOOON OF THE WORLD... I think not, buddy."

"Don't make exuses, you just weren't *GOOD* enough to cut the mustard... or ketchup... or even the cheese for that matter. Your worthless, I pray we make it into the same rhing so I can give you the worst thrashing over your entire career..."

Simon stops for a moment vasking in his own ego before continuing...

"Why? BECAUSE NERD'S RULE!! Now HIT MY music..."

Olivia steps in, "Uhh, Simon, honey... we're standing outside, there's no music to be played."

"Damn It, Olivia, your ruining my thunder here... I know there's no music, it just sounds so dangum cool, whoadie..."

Olivia now confused.

"Back to my training session though, get me that cup of eggs, I'll show them how a real man trains... manliness personified in full effect, booo---eyyy"

Simon scoops the cup of eggs from Olivia's clutches and shovels them down, but just before the camera fades you see him spiting them back up all over t he ground with a ghastly look on his face.


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