The Luster Monument
FADEIN: At the Washington Monument. A distraught Luster, stands in line to enter the Monument. He is sporting an eye patch as a result of his match with Eian at the Gates of Hell. He is wearing a shiny jogging suit and headband. The line is moving slowly to the door. As the line moves, a female reporter approaches Luster to get a few words about his WFW debut at Gates of Hell.
Carly Simmons: Are we on?
CS: This is Carly Simmons reporting live from the Washington Monument. We are here to hear what the WFW wrestler Luster has to say about his recent debut. So Luster I see you are wearing an eye patch.
The reporter approaches Luster and puts the mic to his face as a screaming mob of ladies yell his name and run to him. Luster now has a cluster of ladies around him. They are rubbing and kissing him on the cheek.
Luster: Luster knows the ladies love him. Ladies hold on now. You will all be talking on the banana phone soon enough. Just touch the package for now while Luster gots to speak to the ladies at home.
Luster: Now Carey, right? You know main squeeze Luster gots something to show you after this. How bout we meet later? I could show you the Luster Monument. It’s long and feels like rock and everyone is always waiting in line to see it.
CS: Ok sure. How was your first match at Gates of Hell?
Luster: Luster got robbed. He had the moves and rode in his train from Funkytown. Luster can show you the moves too. Luster was bout to drop the package and that jealous spectator Bradford messed with the Ref. P. Nut was sick that night he couldn’t be there to help the next North Washington Champion win his contendership, Mandingo.
CS: A jealous spectator? I thought you were talking out of turn. You set him off. He’s out for blood. Will you be facing him soon?
CS: You did get beat by the better man, though. Eian was the better man.
Luster: Hold on now main squeeze that punk blinded Luster. Luster is the only man, mandingo. Bradford was there, he helped. Luster will b**ch slap him. Luster was cheated out his chance. Luster will get the dollars here, the dollars there and prevail over all Luster’s jealous spectators. They can’t get the ladies like Luster. They are all in line for the Luster Monument which is now in town till the Cherry Blossoms drop on Bradford’s punk ass, Mandingo. Luster will drop the package in Washington, D.C. Luster wants the likes of you there. Karen, right? You want to be with Luster at ringside or bedside then we can rides the train to Funkytown. You can’t handle the funkyness of Luster but Luster will show you.
Luster: Til next time Bradford and Eian, Luster will give you the package. The Funk then the Wagnell. Bradford, Luster knows you can see him. You betta be scared, Mandingo. What you did at Gates of Luster is disrespectful to the ladies. Luster has something for you too Eian for the Fireball. Bradford, Luster will see you soon.
FADEOUT: Luster grabs the reporter and starts making out with her. The camera falls to the ground and you can now only see the feet of Luster and the ladies leave the scene.
