DT: We're back. Folks, this next match promises to be one for the books, as we've got Intercontinental Champion Jonathan Marx putting his title on the line against the Anglo Luchador, JA!

MN: JA's new to EPW, but he's made such a huge impression that the bigwigs in the front office just had to reward him! 

DM: Take it from me. This is going to be a sight. JA's the kind of guy who can hang on the mat real well, but with Marx you can't win with real well. You've gotta have perfect. You make one little mistake and Marx is on you like that. What JA's gotta do is take it off the mat, come at him from the air where he's got the advantage. 

DT: Some very insightful words there, Dean. We'll see how JA handles so formidable an obstacle as the Gentleman. Take it away, Tony Fatora!  

TONY FATORA: Th' following contest is scheduled for one fall! It will be contested for the Empire Pro Wrestling IN-tercontinental Championship! 

[Cue up: "Only Happy When It Rains" - Garbage. The fans rise up and jeer as Jonathan Marx makes his way to the ring, title belted firmly around his waist. The Gentleman lifts his nose at the hollering crowd, stepping into the ring and heading to his corner.] 

TONY FATORA: Introducing first... He hails from Princeton, New Jersey... He weighs in at two hundred and fifteen pounds... He is the reigning IN-tercontinental Champion... The Gentleman... JONATHAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN... MAAAAAAAAAAARX!!! 

DT: And Jonathan Marx's face tells the story, folks. You can see the look of focus in his eyes. With his date with Sebastian Dodd only days away, you just know that Marx isn't willing to give up his seat to the Anglo Luchador. 

DM: You've got that right. Marx is a focused, technically skilled wrestling machine, and it takes a hell of a wrestler to get one over on him. 

[Cue up: "Eat The Rich" - Fozzy. Accompanied by the roar of the crowd, JA walks out onto the ramp, striding to the ring confidently. He vaults in over the top rope and salutes the fans quickly.] 

TONY FATORA: And the challenger... He hails from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania... He weighs in at exactly two hundred and fifteen and three-eighths of a pound... He is the Anglo Luchador... JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!! 

DM: Just from the tale of the tape you can tell this is going to be a very even match. Both guys at two hundred and fifteen pounds, within a couple inches of each other in height. Marx has a little more leverage and is better on the mat, but JA's more compact and brings the quickness advantage. 

MN: Watch the Emperor shoot him down! 

[SFX: *DING* - Bell rings.] 

DT: And there's the bell! Marx and JA circling quickly, and there's the collar and elbow tie-up. Marx through into the hammerlock, JA switches up and gets the side headlock takeover to bring the Gentleman to the canvas. 

MN: Nothin' like a wee bit of chain wrestling, eh Burgerman? 

DT: Marx matrixes up out of the headlock, ducks under and gets the standing arm wringer on JA. JA looking to counter with the fireman's carry, but Marx swings through and takes him down with the double-leg clip. Could be looking for a half crab - JA powers out before Marx can step over. 

DM: You can see that Marx has a bit of an advantage there. Look at how easily he blocked that fireman's carry. Marx's technical aptitude is definitely showing. 

MN: He's the Emperor, baby! Woo! 

DT: Both men to their feet now. Going for a tie-up - Marx shoots in with the go-behind, there's the rear waistlock and the belly-to-back takedown, and it looks like Marx is going to the side headlock. He's got it cinched in - JA fights to his feet - could be looking for a back suplex - Marx bulldogs him to the mat and keeps the pressure on the head and neck of the Anglo Luchador. 

MN: That thing is like a vice! Notice how even Marx's most basic holds look deadly? 

DM: That's the Marx advantage, Mike. Marx is so technically sound that he can take you apart with just basic holds. He's got a great grasp of the fundamentals and knows how to pick apart your body piece by piece. 

MN: Dag. 

DT: JA again fighting to his feet... Trying to shove Marx off, but the Gentleman isn't budging. Now JA back into the ropes, using the momentum to shoot Marx out of the headlock - Marx rebounds and catches JA with the shoulder block, then immediately goes back to the headlock! 

DM: See what I mean? He picks a body part and he keeps at it like a wild dog. 

MN: He snapped that thing on like lightning! 

DT: Again JA fighting against that hold - up to his feet, backs Marx into the ropes, but this time Marx rolls through and brings JA down with another headlock takedown. You have to think JA's in a world of trouble here. 

DM: Definitely, Dave. Marx is controlling JA completely right now. At this rate it's gonna take JA awhile to build up to any sort of comeback. 

MN: Not giving your opponents a chance to fight back? Now that isn't very gentlemanly... 

DM: You think that's gonna stop him? 

DT: Don't count JA out yet, guys, because he's fighting to his feet again - Locks his arms around Marx - boosts him up - OH, ATOMIC DROP breaks the hold and stuns Jonathan Marx! Marx staggers around, and JA takes him to the mat with a forearm smash! 

DM: Good, good move by JA. He saw an opening and he took it. 

MN: After all that spiel, it was Marx who left himself open! I guess even the Emperor makes mistakes, huh? 

DT: JA waiting for Marx to come to his feet. Marx up - running clothesline by JA rocks the Gentleman hard. Again Marx to his feet - another big clothesline by the Anglo Luchador! Marx now rolling to the outside to regroup - wait wait wait OHHHHH! JA NAILS Marx with a BEAUTIFUL plancha from the ring to the floor! 

MN: DAMN! That was slick! 

DM: What'd I tell you! JA brings the aerial assault! He keeps that up and he's going to have Marx reeling. 

DT: Looks like JA is gaining control of this match as he picks up the stunned Marx... whips him into the apron, and Marx is in a world of hurt! Now JA rolls Marx back into the ring. JA climbing to the apron... Waiting... Marx is up... JA leaps to the ropes and SPRINGBOARDS INTO A BEAUTIFUL DROPKICK, AND MARX IS DOWN! 

DM: BEAUTY! 

DT: JA going for the cover! One - TWO - NO, Marx JUST kicks out. 

MN: That dropkick was a thing of beauty. Hoo! 

DT: It sure was, Mike. JA bringing Marx to his feet now, whips him off into the ropes, and the big elbow takes Marx right back down again. And there's the big leg drop by JA, right across the throat of Jonathan Marx! 

MN: He's, uh, Anglo-ing up? 

DM: No more copyright infringement. PLEASE. We're already in enough s**t with a certain Mr. E-Z. 

DT: This crowd firmly behind JA as he whips Jonathan Marx off into the corner. Now mounting the ropes with Marx beneath him - slugging away! 

[CROWD: ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!] 

DT: Ten big right hands from the Anglo Luchador! Now looking for the monkey flip out of the corner - Marx grabs JA's legs and bridges over for the surprise roll-up! One! TWO! No, JA kicked out! 

DM: Again you see the technical skill of Marx. JA spent too much time showing off and not enough time paying attention to his opponent. 

DT: Both men come to their feet now - JA moves in, but Marx gets the double leg takedown! Drags JA towards the corner - catapult sends JA face-first into the turnbuckle, and Marx follows up with the schoolboy! One - TWO - Kickout by the challenger! 

MN: Marx is right back on the attack! 

DT: And Marx not letting up here, as he goes to the grounded front facelock on JA, locking up his head and neck good and tight! This is a very simple hold, but very devastating if you know how to properly apply it. 

DM: Which Marx does. 

DT: JA trying to fight the hold, but Marx is just controlling the Anglo Luchador's head right now, trying to shut down his body from the top down. 

MN: He's rendered him topless! Haha! 

DM: I hate you, Michael. Your puns are bad. 

MN: Wow... That was blunt. 

DM: I hate freelance competition. 

DT: Now JA starting to fight to his feet... He's up, but Marx suplexes him right back down! Bridging for the pin - could be it here - JA gets that shoulder up! Marx rolls over for the lateral press - one - TWO - Again JA gets the shoulder up! 

DM: Marx is keeping the pressure on real good here. He's not giving JA a chance to bounce back like he did before. 

DT: Slowly but surely, JA's coming to his feet... Marx snapmares him back down crisply, then goes to the seated full nelson! 

MN: Why's it called a full nelson, anyway? His name isn't Nelson! 

DM: It is now! 

MN: Nelson Marx? 

DT: Shush, you two. Marx cinching in that full nelson and putting pressure on the neck of JA, wearing him down for his signature submission, the Marxism STF. JA's in a LOT of pain here! 

DM: Again, this is a basic hold, but it's one that's very hard to fight out of. Once again you see how Marx isolates that neck and just rips it apart methodically. Every time JA tries to mount a comeback, Marx shuts him down and goes right back to working on that neck. 

MN: It's the Nelson Marx Advantage! 

DT: JA fighting to his feet... Backpedals into the corner and slams Marx against the turnbuckles, but Marx is NOT letting go of that hold! JA hooks his foot around the rope, forcing referee Emilio Gomez to call for the break. Marx gives it to him. 

MN: What a gentleman! 

DT: Now Marx bringing JA out of the corner. Hooks him up for a German suplex - Heaves - JA locks his legs around Marx's waist for the quick roll-through! One - TWO - Marx kicks out! 

DM: Ooooh, surprised him! 

DT: Both men up, Marx shoots in towards JA, but the Anglo Luchador hits the big knee to the gut! Underhooks both arms... Pulls Marx up and DROPS HIM ACROSS HIS KNEE WITH A BACKBREAKER! 

MN: OOOOH! 

DM: DAMN! That had to sting! 

DT: I'll say! Again JA on the offensive with the big knees to the back of Marx and - wait a minute, Sebastian Dodd's coming down the ramp! 

MN: Oh my Dodd! Dodd's here! 

DM: *snerk* 

DT: Fortunately it looks like he's just here to watch, as he's standing at ringside observing the action as JA whips Marx off into the ropes. Oh, HUGE dropkick by JA catches Marx upside the jaw! The cover! One - two - Marx gets that shoulder up! 

DM: Obviously Sebastian Dodd's going to have an interest in this match. He's scouting out Marx for the Pay-Per-View, learning from JA's example. 

MN: THE EYES OF DODD ARE UPON YOU, JONATHAN!!! 

DM: *snickering* 

DT: And JA's continuing his offensive here, sending Marx off into the corner. Charges in - no, Marx gets the foot up and stops JA cold! Now Marx going to the top rope - JA recovers and stuns him with a right hand to the gut! 

MN: Back and forth, back and forth... 

DT: JA with another big right to the gut of Marx. Now he's going up... Underhooks both arms... OH!!! BUTTERFLY SUPLEX OFF THE TOP ROPE TO JONATHAN MARX!!! 

DM: THERE GOES THE REF!! 

MN: REF BUMP!!! 

DT: Oh my! Jonathan Marx's leg caught referee Gomez in the face as he came down, and the official is out! 

DM: This doesn't look good... 

DT: Both Marx and JA coming to their feet... Wait a minute, Dodd grabbing that steel chair from ringside! He's sliding into the ring... WALKING TOWARDS JA!!! 

DM: Oh snap! He's protecting his investment! 

DT: Dodd SWINGS - NO, JA PULLS MARX IN FRONT OF HIM!!! MARX TAKES THE CHAIR IN THE FACE!!! 

MN: DID YOU HEAR THAT CRACK?!?! DODD DECKED HIM!!! 

DM: DAG!!! 

DT: Dodd is dumbfounded! He hit the wrong guy! Swings at JA - JA ducks and SHOVES Dodd over the ropes! Marx is OUT - but JA puts icing on it! Springs off the ropes! LIONSAULT connects! 

DM: It's over! 

DT: The official's recovered! The count! 

One! 

TWO! 

THREEEE!!! WE HAVE A NEW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!!! 

MN: WHAT AN UPSET!!! 

[SFX: *DING* - Bell rings.] 

TONY FATORA: The winner of the match, and NEEEEEEEEEEEW IN-tercontinental Champion... JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!! 

DT: Talk about your backfires! Dodd missed his intended target and inadvertantly cost Jonathan Marx the Intercontinental title! 

DM: Great match. 

DT: Folks we'll be right back after a quick break! 

[Cut to a commercial for Cheezy Weezy Cheese Sticks, endorsed by Cheezel the Weasel.]