JACOBS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall, and is the finals for the Single Night Tournament to determine who will be the #1 contender at New ERA of Wrestling’s first LIVE from taking place in Birmingham, Alabama! Introducing first…”
(CUEUP: “Nobody Does It Better” by Carly Simon. The fans pop HUGE.)
JACOBS: “He stands five foot eleven and weighs in at 211 pounds … hailing from Orlando, Florida… the former New ERA of Wrestling World Heavyweight champion…. SHAWN …. JESSICA … HART … PEE AYCH DEE!”
(Hart comes up from beneath the deck to a huge round of pops and slaps hands as he makes his way to the ring.)
GHEORGHE: “I still think that Shawn Hart has the fortitude to make it through this match … and I know that ever since he got a taste of the World Heavyweight Championship he has been dying to get it back!”
JULIUS: “He pulled a fast one over Jonathan Marx after BattleBRAWL 2 … but that was then … and now he’s got to face a much more formidable opponent.”
JACOBS: “And his opponent… hailing from Conservative Middle America…”
(CUEUP: “Imperial March” by John Williams. The voices of Conservative Political figures talk over the music as the fans get to their feet and jeer as Phantom Republican makes his way to the ring.)
JACOBS: “He stands six foot five and weighs 257 pounds …. and is a former New ERA of Wrestling World Heavyweight champion….. THE PHANTOM …. REPUBLICAN!”
(GOP stops at the bottom of the stairs to look at the crowd, probably scanning for illegal Cubans trying to make their escape back to the States.)
GHEORGHE: “The fans here REALLY do not like GOP .. he defeated their hero Jean Rabesque earlier .. and now he’s just one step away from a rematch for the World Heavyweight Championship … a title many people think he should have never lost.”
JULIUS: “Myself included!”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
GHEORGHE: “Both men standing in the middle of the ring as the referee explains the rules of the match … AND PHANTOM REPUBLICAN JUST SLAPPED SHAWN HART ACROSS THE FACE!”
JULIUS: “Smacked him like the little bitch that he is!”
GHEORGHE: “Hart takes his hand away from his cheek …. And he spears Phantom Republican to the mat!”
(SFX: Crowd pops huge.)
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart with lefts and rights into the face of the Phantom Republican!! GOP trying to cover his face, but Hart is persistent.”
JIVE: “GOP might have started this match off the wrong way, but what a way to start. Ha!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart gets off GOP and grabs him by the mask .. Hart with GOP on his feet … grabs him .. and nails the inverted atomic drop! GOP standing there … AND HART WITH A DROPKICK SENDS GOP THROUGH THE ROPES TO THE OUTSIDE!”
JIVE: “That’s not a good place to be with Shawn Hart starting this match on a roll..”
GHEORGHE: “GOP back on his feet … AND HART CHARGES AND FLIES THROUGH THE ROPES RIGHT ON TOP OF THE PHANTOM REPUBLICAN!”
(SFX: Crowd goes crazy!)
GHEORGHE: “The Phantom Republican is down on the floor … and Shawn Hart gets back up … Hart now grabbing the leg of GOP .. and he’s dragging him over to the ring steps! And Hart slams the leg down! And again! Shawn Hart is on a roll here in this final match of the one night tournament!”
JULIUS: “This is completely unfair! GOP had to battle through the snooze fest that was Jean Rabesque .. and now he’s being taken advantage of by Hart.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart brings GOP to his feet … and rams his back into the ring apron! Finally Hart is bringing this match back into the ring! Shawn Hart rolling GOP in .. and now he’s foll….. no … he’s climbing the ropes!”
JIVE: “Shawn Hart taking chances early ..”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart perched on the top rope … AND HE FLIES OFF NAILING THE ELBOW DROP! Cover! ONE …. TW—NOOO. The Phantom Republican kicks out.”
JULIUS: “Hart tried to catch GOP off guard with an early pinfall, but GOP is a little bit too strong for that still.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart grabs the leg of GOP .. and wraps it around … he’s got the Phantom Republican in a figure four leglock!”
JIVE: “Jesus, didn’t GOP already defeat Rabesque once tonight? What Hart, Mini-Rabesque?”
GHEORGHE: “GOP sitting up … and Hart nails him in the face with a closed fist putting him back down! Hart really has that figure four locked on … he’s trying to wear GOP down early on in this match.”
JULIUS: “GOP is a former World Heavyweight champion. He won that title from Jean Rabesque … he beat Jean Rabesque here tonight … and he’ll go on to face whoever the World Heavyweight champion is at LIVE from ..”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart … releasing the figure four now .. and he hops to his feet. Hart plants a boot into the lower back of GOP … and another! A third! GOP crawls into the ring ropes and the referee stops Hart from following him in.”
JIVE: “That’s what GOP needs … a second to regroup.”
GHEORGHE: “Hart trying to get at the Phantom Republican … and the ref……”
(SFX: Crowd jeers!)
GHEORGHE: “That scoundrel! GOP grabbed onto the referee … and used that as an opportunity to low blow Hart! Shawn Hart is doubled over … GOP places his head beneath the jaw of Hart … AND SLAMS IT DOWN! Republican back on his feet … AND HITS THE SWINGING NECKBREAKER ON HART! The cover …. ONE …. TWO … KICKOUT!”
JIVE: “Whatever Hart can do, GOP can do better!”
GHEORGHE: “The Phantom Republican obviously not happy at how this match started … and now he grabs Hart and places his throat on the middle rope …. and now GOP placing all his weight onto the back of Hart!”
JULIUS: “Hart’s turning blue from the lack of oxygen..”
JIVE: “Or maybe it’s the sea sickness?”
JULIUS: “Ah, good point.. your first of the night probably.”
JIVE: “Shut the fu..”
GHEORGHE: “Phantom Republican really leaning into Hart… and finally the ref making the count …”
JULIUS: “Too late for that, GOP has already done a great deal of damage.”
GHEORGHE: “The ref gets to four before the former World Heavyweight champion releases… and now GOP against the far ropes … comes back …. AND HOPS DOWN ON THE BACK OF HART! Shawn Hart now falls off the rope and to the mat and is holding his throat.”
JIVE: “Any sort of advantage that Shawn Hart had with GOP being in the first match of the evening has slowly whittled away.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP now walking over to Shawn Hart and he scoops him up off the mat. GOP now hooking the tights … and he HOISTS Hart up in the air with the vertical suplex …. But comes down front first with the Unilateral Strike!”
JULIUS: “You’d never know that GOP was in his second match of the night by watching him right now .. the man is a beast!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP with the sloppy cover …. ONE ….. TWO .... and Hart kicks out! If GOP wants to get that World Heavyweight championship shot he’s going to have to do more than just lie on top of Shawn Hart!”
JULIUS: “That is such an easy set up, I think I’ll pass on it.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP back to his feet … and he is standing there … just waiting for Hart to start moving!”
JIVE: “Like a hunter waiting for his prey.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart starting to move … and now he’s slowly getting to his knees.. Hart is up …. AND GOP COMES FLYING FROM BEHIND CLIPPING HIM IN THE KNEE! GOP quickly grabs the leg … AND SLAMS IT KNEE FIRST INTO THE MAT!”
JULIUS: “Take away the mobility of Shawn Hart and you take away any chance he has of walking out of here victorious..”
JIVE: “Hell, you take away any chance of him walking out of here period!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP placing Hart’s leg on the middle rope …. And now he’s hopping up … AND CRASHES DOWN!! Shawn Hart looking to be in immense pain from that …. And now GOP’s setting him up again! GOP hops up ….”
(SFX: Fans explode!)
GHEORGHE: “AND HART USES HIS FREE LEG TO BOOT GOP OVER THE TOP ROPE!!! Phantom Republican crashes into the ringside area below!”
JIVE: “I don’t know if Hart did that on purpose, or if it was instinct… but one thing is sure, in one swift boot, this match has sure gone back to the middle.”
GHEORGHE: “I’m not sure if GOP hit his head, or his shoulder, when he dropped to the arena floor, but he looks like he is knocked out cold!”
JULIUS: “And the referee wasting no time in counting him out either!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP still not moving as the referee gets to five … BUT HART IS!! Shawn Hart is using the ring ropes to pull himself to his feet!”
JIVE: “He’s shaking that leg … trying to work the kinks out.”
GHEORGHE: “The referee up to seven now … as GOP finally raises his head! But Shawn Hart stops the referee! Shawn Hart just picked the referee up, turned around and put him down!”
JULIUS: “DISQUALIFY HIM!! You don’t put your hands on a referee!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart …. HART IS CLIMBING THE CORNER!! SHAWN HART IS ALL THE WAY UP ON THE TOP TURNBUCKLE AND HE’s WAITING FOR GOP DOWN BELOW!”
JULIUS: “What the hell is he doing? Bum knee and all!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP has no clue that Hart is all the way on the top …. HART … HART turns … GOP turns ….. ASAI MOOOOOONSAULT FROM THE TOP ROPE TO THE ARENA FLOOR!!!”
(SFX: Crowd gasps!)
JULIUS: “HART MISSED!! HART MISSED!”
GHEORGHE: “By God! GOP saw Hart coming at the last second and sidestepped him!! Shawn Hart just went crashing to the floor!!!”
JIVE: “I think the ship just went three feet deeper into the water after that impact!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP wipes his brow … and rolls back into the ring to stop the ref’s count .. and now he’s back out! GOP is back out …. AND HE’s GRABBING A CHAIR!”
JULIUS: “What’s he doing… he’s setting the chair up!”
JIVE: “Now is not the time to take a break…”
JULIUS: “You really are a newb, aren’t you?”
GHEORGHE: “The chair is set up and the Phantom Republican walks over to Hart’s carcass. GOP dragging Hart over to the chair .. and now he’s sitting him in it! Hart’s head just wobbling back and forth as GOP gets him all set up.”
JIVE: “Hart took the risk .. it wasn’t smart considering the state he was in .. so now he has to face the consequences.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP walks to the far steps … and he is walking to the ring apron! GOP pausing … AND NOW HE RUNS A FEW STEPS, AND LEAPS OFF THE APRON CLOTHESLINING HART!! Shawn Hart flips … CHAIR AND ALL!”
JULIUS: “This is why GOP deserves to be #1 competitor to the World Heavyweight championship! He picks his shots and executes!”
GHEORGHE: “The referee now yelling at GOP to bring the action back in the ring, and I think GOP is happily obliging! GOP grabs Hart and rolls him into the ring!”
JIVE: “GOP making the cover … and this time hooking the leg! ONE …… TWO ……… THREE!!!!!”
GHEORGHE: “NO NO NO!! Shawn Hart managed to get out at the last second and GOP slams the mat in frustration!”
JULIUS: “That Hart has got some fight in him .. either that or he was knocked stupid by the ship deck when he missed the asai moonsault.”
JIVE: “That’s if there was any sense in him to begin with.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP … I think he’s calling for the end of this match.. he’s had enough!”
JULIUS: “The fans are letting him have it, too.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP grabs Hart by the hair … and irish whips him into the corner …. And now he charges in after him ….. DEFICIT RUNNER! Shawn Hart stumbles out …. AND GOP FROM BEHIND WITH THE BULLDOG! ONE …… TWO ….. THREE ….. NOOOO!”
JIVE: “GOP not slowing down … he just dropped a knee into the skull of Hart.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP against the ropes … AND HE DROPS THE LEG ACROSS THE THROAT OF HART!! ONE ………. TWO …….. THREE---AND HART GETS OUT AGAIN!”
(SFX: The fans start chanting “HART! HART! HART!”)
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart putting up a hell of a resistance … and now GOP grabs him … GOP …. GOP WITH THE SNAKE EYES!!!”
(SFX: Fans jeer!)
GHEORGHE: “GOP … GOP setting up Hart for the MOAB!”
JULIUS: “Finally putting the dog out of his misery!”
(SFX: “ARRRRRRGH!”)
JIVE: “Jesus Christ!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart with a LOUD grunt as HE BACK BODY DROPS GOP! That took every ounce of strength in Hart’s body… and GOP is stunned as he sits back up!”
JULIUS: “I don’t think GOP was expecting that .. especially after hitting Hart with the Snake Eyes.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP back to his feet and he grabs Hart by the he…. SMALL PACKAGE!!! HART ROLLS GOP UP!!! ONE ………….. TWO …………… THREE!!! HE DID IT!!!”
(SFX: FANS EXPLODE!!!!)
JULIUS: “THE REF SIGNALLING THAT GOP GOT OUT!”
(SFX: Fans jeer hardcore!)
GHEORGHE: “Yes! The referee holding up two fingers! Two fingers! GOP pops back to his feet … AND SLAMS THE ELBOW INTO THE FACE OF SHAWN HART! GOP now bringing Hart over to the corner … AND PLANTS A KNEE INTO THE MIDSECTION! And another! A third! Fourth! Fifth!”
JULIUS: “Hart got GOP all riled up .. and a Republican scorned is war!”
GHEORGHE: “Don’t we know that all too well, Dean.”
JIVE: “I don’t get it.”
GHEORGHE: “GOP now places Shawn Hart onto the top turnbuckle … and it looks like he’s going up with him!! Hart now on his feet on the top … GOP locks the waist……”
(SFX: Crowd pops!)
GHEORGHE: “BELLY TO BELLY SUPERPLEX!!!”
JIVE: “There’s no way Shawn Hart can continue to take this much punishment!”
GHEORGHE: “Phantom Republican inches over to Hart and places his hand on top of him …. ONE ……………… TWO ……………….. THRRREEEE!!!”
JULIUS: “FINALLY!”
JIVE: “NO!”
(SFX: The boat shakes as the fans on it scream at the top of their lungs.)
GHEORGHE: “HART KICKED OUT! HART KICKED OUT!”
JULIUS: “How the hell did he manage that?”
JIVE: “Steroids!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP can only roll on his back and let out a sigh … both men are down. That took a lot out of the Phantom Republican … and I’m not sure he can capitalize on it!”
JIVE: “That man has already wrestled once tonight, Gheorghe! Cut him some slack!”
GHEORGHE: “The referee trying to get one, or both, to their feet. He’s checking on GOP … who waves him away. Now he’s checking on Hart..”
JULIUS: “Is Hart even conscious anymore?”
GHEORGHE: “Who knows! GOP finally trying to get to his feet after what must feel like an eternity..”
JIVE: “Did Hart just move his legs?”
JULIUS: “I saw that, too …”
GHEORGHE: “Hart … HART IS GETTING ON HIS KNEES!! He’s trying to get up!”
JIVE: “I don’t think GOP sees him yet! He has his back to Shawn Hart.”
GHEORGHE: “Hart using the ropes … GOP using the ropes …. AND BY GOD THEY’RE BOTH BACK ON THEIR FEET!”
JULIUS: “And GOP just turned around and looks stunned! He’s staring at Shawn Hart while Hart rests on the ropes!”
GHEORGHE: “GOP now walking towards Hart … he raises his arms…”
(SFX: HUGE EXPLOSION!)
GHEORGHE: “AND HART WITH A REVERSE CRESCENT KICK!!! GOP goes down like a sack of potatoes!”
JIVE: “Hart was waiting for him!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart now with a devious smile on his face … and the fans here are all on their feet! Shawn Hart … shimmies and shakes as GOP gets up …. AND HE POPS GOP IN THE JAW! European uppercut! Another! GOP fights back! GOP with a left hook of his own!! Right! Left! GOP winds up …. BUT HART DUCKS! GOP swings around … AND HART PICKS HIM UP!!! SHAWN HART NAILING THE TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!!! ONE ………………. TWO ……………………… THREE---NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!”
(SFX: Crowd pops initially, then quiets down.)
GHEORGHE: “GOP out at the very end! Shawn Hart…. He grabs GOP ……. HE’S GOING FOR THE FUJIWARA ARMBAR!!”
JULIUS: “If Hart gets this then he’s going to go to LIVE from… as the #1 contender!”
GHEORGHE: “HART HAS IT LOCKED ON!!! HART HAS THE FUJIWARA ARMBAR LOCKED ON!!”
(SFX: Fans explode!)
GHEORGHE: “It’s about to be lights out for the Phantom Republican! Shawn Hart is just moments away from winning this match!”
JIVE: “No!! Not like this!”
GHEORGHE: “The Phantom Republican trying to fight Hart’s signature move with every bone in his body… but I just can’t see how it’s going to work!”
JULIUS: “What a night for the Phantom Republican, though .. he made it past Jean Rabesque, and came so clos…….”
GHEORGHE: “GOP!! GOP!! HE SOMEHOW GRABBED THE BOTTOM ROPE!!! The referee is calling for Hart to break the hold!”
JIVE: “Hart thinks he won!! He just released the hold and threw his arms up in the air!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart still a bit dazed from the amount of punishment he took … and the referee is now explaining to him it was a rope break!”
JULIUS: “Hart argues with the referee… he’s yelling at him to be more specific next time!”
GHEORGHE: “Hart walks back over to GOP … and GOP grabs onto Hart’s legs! GOP … he’s holding on for dear life … and Hart is flailing trying not to lose his balance!!”
JIVE: “Hart just grabbed the referee to stabilize himself!! That’s twice tonight he’s touched the referee!! God dammit, just disqualify him already!”
GHEORGHE: “The referee trying to free himself from Hart……”
(SFX: Crowd jeers loudly!!)
GHEORGHE: “AND GOP WITH ANOTHER LOW BLOW!! His second of the match! Shawn Hart… is doubled over…. AND GOP PICKS HIM UP ………. SNAKE EYES!!!”
JIVE: “What a smart move!”
GHEORGHE: “The Phantom Republican ….. he sets Hart up…………………… MOAB!!! MOAB!! GOP NAILS IT!!!”
JULIUS: “ONE …………………… TWO ………………………. THREE!!! HE DID IT!! HE FINALLY DID IT!”
(SFX: Bell rings. The fans revile, and begin to throw things into the ring.)
JACOBS: “The winner of this match … and the NUMBER ONE CONTENDER to the New ERA World Heavyweight championship ….”
(CUEUP: ‘The Imperial March’ by John Williams.)
JACOBS: “THE PHANTOM …………….. REPUBLICAN!”
GHEORGHE: “By God, what a hellacious, and hard fought battle by both men! GOP has definitely earned the right tonight to call himself the #1 contender … and he’ll face either Daymon, Larry Tact, or Jonathan Marx at New ERA’s first LIVE from … Birmingham!..”
JIVE: “Like it was ever in question that the Phantom Republican wouldn’t win?! He has to regain the title that he should never have lost … and whoever walks out with the World Heavyweight championship better beware… GOP is gunning for you.”
