JACOBS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall and has a thirty minute time limit! Introducing first ….”
(Alex Borden comes from behind the curtain and walks down to the ring hurriedly. He hops into the ring and begins stretching.)
GHEORGHE: “Borden is ready to go it seems in his debut match here on RAUCOUS!”
JACOBS: “Hailing from Cleveland, Ohio …. He stands six foot two and weighs 230 pounds ……. ALEX BORDEN!”
JIVE: “I can’t wait for this match … its probably the second most anticipated match of the night!”
JACOBS: “And his opponent…”
(CUEUP: 'Woodpecker From Mars' by Faith No More. The lights go out when the music starts. When the first rift plays, the words "The Man" appear on the screen. When the second rift plays, the words "The Myth" appear on the screen. When the third rift plays, the words "The Legend" appear on the screen. Then when the music starts playing real fast with a fast guitar rift, the lights start flickering throughout the arena, where Suicide is seen at the top of the entranceway. When the song settles into a complete rift, the lights come on full bright and Suicide walks calmly to the ring. He gets to the ring, and slides on one knee across the apron and then stands up just as quick on his feet. He enters the ring and then adjusts his finger-cut gloves.)
JACOBS: “Hailing from the Bronx, New York ….”
DOE: “Suicide knows how to make an entrance!”
JACOBS: “He stands six foot three and weighs 231 pounds ….. he is the man … the myth … the legend …… SUICIDE!”
(SFX: Bell rings)
GHEORGHE: “Alex Borden tests out the ropes… And Suicide is walking around the ring keeping his eyes on Borden..”
DOE: “I’m expecting big things from these two.”
GHEORGHE: “Suicide gets hit with a dragon screw from Alex Borden!! Now Borden immediately to the corner … goes to the second ropes … AND SUICIDE DOESN’T MOVE OUT OF THE WAY QUICK ENOUGH AS BORDEN COMES OFF WITH AN ELBOW!”
JIVE: “I don’t think Suicide was ready for the dragon screw from Borden .. that move isn’t really a part of Borden’s repertoire!”
DOE: “Borden has to be careful .. those ribs can’t be feeling too good after all he’s been through.”
GHEORGHE: “Suicide is now standing … and Borden picks him up and drops him with a fireman’s carry. Suicide back to his feet … But Borden grabs his leg and takes him down! Alex Borden doesn’t want to give Suicide an inch of breathing room.”
JIVE: “You give Suicide an inch, he’ll take a mile.”
DOE: “Why am I not surprised that you used a shitty cliché right there?”
JIVE: “Why am I not surprised that everyone at the FW Torch thinks you’re an untalented loser?”
GHEORGHE: “Borden walks over to Suicide who is getting back to his feet … Borden with a left hook .. NO! Suicide ducks … AND SNAP SUPLEXES BORDEN TO THE MAT! Suicide is now standing … and he has Borden in a grapevine submission hold!”
DOE: “This match already turning into a great technical battle..”
GHEORGHE: “BUT BORDEN MONKEY FLIPS SUICIDE TO GET OUT OF THE HOLD!”
JIVE: “Monkey, eh? Isn’t that named after you’re mom, John?”
DOE: “How you keep your job is beyond me … no wait … you are Marceau’s vibrator .. I get it.”
GHEORGHE: “Borden now back to his feet and gets Suicide into an arm wrench. But Suicide is trying to turn it around ….. Suicide manages to go back under … AND HE DRIVES THE SHOULDER INTO THE CHEST OF BORDEN AND BORDEN RELEASES THE HOLD! Alex Borden now hooked …. DOUBLE UNDERHOOK SUPLEX SENDS BORDEN TO THE MAT!”
DOE: “I didn’t realize how nicely these two match up against each other. You know, Suicide didn’t seem too enthralled by Borden leading up to this match .. and I think Borden is trying to show him that he needs to be more respectful.”
JIVE: “Or … you’re full of bull.”
GHEORGHE: “Alex Borden back to his feet …. And SUICIDE BRINGS HIM BACK DOWN WITH A NECKBREAKER! Suicide with the cover …. ONE …. TW-NO.. Borden kicked out of it.”
JIVE: “Once again, pinfalls happening too early. Suicide needs to spend more time on the chest and ribs of Borden if he wants to get this thing finished.”
GHEORGHE: “Suicide bringing Borden back to his feet .. and he brings him back down to the mat with a Mexican armdrag takedown! Suicide gets back up and he is waiting for Borden to get to his feet!”
DOE: “By allowing Borden to get to his feet, he’s also letting him time to think of a defense.”
GHEORGHE: “Suicide now coming in at Borden … kicks him in the gu.. no! Borden catches the foot, BUT SUICIDE REVERSES IT WITH A SUICIDE ENZIGUIRI TO THE FACE OF BORDEN! But Borden only goes down on one knee… AND SUICIDE COUNTERS THAT BY CONNECTING WITH A SHORT LARIAT! Suicide against the ropes ….. AND DROPS THE KNEE RIGHT INTO THE STERNUM OF ALEX BORDEN!”
JIVE: “Suicide has a history of injuring people.. first in EPW, then by forcing Brody Hansen to leave New ERA …”
DOE: “Stop causing problems. Hansen was already hurt.”
GHEORGHE: “Now Suicide applying the arm wrench on Borden’s arm as Borden is trying to get back on his feet … Borden with an elbow into the stomach of Suicide …. Another …. A third … AND FINALLY HE CONNECTS A RIGHT FIST TO THE JAW OF SUICIDE RELEASING THE HOLD!”
DOE: “Alex Borden has good enough moves to fight toe to toe with anyone.”
GHEORGHE: “Borden locks the arms … BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX SENDS SUICIDE HALFWAY ACROSS THE RING! Suicide getting up … but here comes Borden … and Borden nails Suicide with a kick to the head …. And follows it with an elbowsmash to the face! Alex Borden now dancing around on the mat … he connects with a left jab … another left jab … AND TAKES SUICIDE TO THE MAT WITH AN UPPERCUT!”
JIVE: “Borden looks like Muhammed Ali out there! Except .. well..”
GHEORGHE: “Alex Borden now measures Suicide and hits him with a leg drop. Suicide grabbing his throat … AS BORDEN DROPS A CLOSED FIST INTO THE FOREHEAD OF SUICIDE!! ALEX BORDEN WITH THE COVER!!! ONE ….. TWO ….. TH—NO! Suicide kicked out of it!”
JIVE: “That would have been a lame way to lose! Almost like some random guy ruining your chance to win the TV title by smashing some other guy over the head with a chair .. pretty lame.”
DOE: “You’re walking a fine line already, Nick..”
GHEORGHE: “Alex Borden brings Suicide to his feet … tossing him backwards into the ropes … Suicide bounces off and Borden connects with a right fist! Borden ties up Suicide …. TIGER SUPLEXES HIM TO THE MAT! Alex Borden with the cover …. ONE …. TWO …. Kickout by Suicide!”
DOE: “I better be careful. Both these guys are a threat to my Television championship .. and Tact should be careful because I think either one would put up a great fight for the World Heavyweight championship.”
JIVE: “I’d rather be fired than see you with the Television championship.”
DOE: “I can arrange that.”
GHEORGHE: “Alex Borden bringing Suicide over to the corner .. and now Suicide is trying to fight back! Suicide with some elbows to the chest of Borden and Borden is grimacing! Suicide breaks from Borden’s grasp! Suicide behind Borden!!! GORDBUSTER!!! Alex Borden goes crashing into the mat! SUICIDE STAMPEDE!! RIGHT ON THE CHEST OF ALEX BORDEN!”
JIVE: “Time for Suicide to incapacitate another one.”
GHEORGHE: “Suicide drops the elbow on top of the ribcage of Borden … goes for the cover …. ONE ….. TWO ….. THRE—NO! Suicide hits the mat in frustration as he brings Borden to his feet. Suicide with an irish whip and Borden goes into the ropes …. Suicide follows him in .. AND DRIVES A KNEE INTO THE CHEST OF BORDEN!”
DOE: “Borden is grasping his chest in pain.”
GHEORGHE: “Suicide with another irish whip … waits for Borden to come back … AND BORDEN COMES BACK WITH A SNAP DDT AND BOTH MEN ARE ON THE MAT!”
DOE: “The ref is quick to put the standing ten on these guys. I’m glad to see at least one ref can keep a match under control.”
JIVE: “Aw, let me guess. You’re still sore about the loss last time?”
DOE: “I’m just saying that some refs haven’t been doing a good job.”
GHEORGHE: “The ref up to six now as both men are getting to their feet. ALEX BORDEN LUNGES AT SUICIDE AND TAKES HIM DOWN WITH A SPEAR!! He is pounding away as Suicide cannot get his hands up to block the blows! Borden is up on his feet and he is looking down at Suicide and shaking his head in disgust!”
JIVE: “If there’s one thing I don’t think you should do its give Suicide time to recover like this.”
GHEORGHE: “Borden picks Suicide up by the hai.. SUICIDE GRABS BORDEN BY THE THROAT!!!! SUICIDE IS UP ON HIS FEET AND HE HAS BOTH HANDS AROUND THE THROAT OF BORDEN!”
(SFX: Crowd groans.)
GHEORGHE: “AND ALEX BORDEN JUST KNEED SUICIDE RIGHT IN THE GROIN! THERE IT IS!!! THERE IT IS!!! BORDEN HAS THE CHOKE OUT ON SUICIDE!”
DOE: “Suicide is fighting it! He is trying desperately to reverse or get out of the hold.”
GHEORGHE: “SUICIDE IS SLOWLY LOSING CONCSIOUSNESS!! The ref picks up his arm … and it falls!!!”
JIVE: “Suicide has practically stopped moving!”
GHEORGHE: “The ref picks up Suicide’s arm again … AND IT FALLS A SECOND TIME!”
JIVE: “Goodnight sweet nurse.”
GHEORGHE: “The ref picks up Suicide’s arm one last time …….. AND IT FALLS A THIRD TIME!!! ALEX BORDEN HAS JUST WON THIS MATCH!”
(SFX: Bell rings)
JACOBS: “The winner of this match by submission ….. ALEX BORDEN!”
DOE: “Suicide is conked out in the middle of the ring!!”
(Borden looks one last time at Suicide before leaving the ring and begins walking up the ramp, holding his chest.)
GHEORGHE: “Alex Borden managing an incredible victory tonight and his ribs look like they’re in an incredible amount of pain.”
(SFX: Crowd pops ..)
GHEORGHE: “WAIT A MINUTE!!! CHAOS HAS JUST CLIMBED FROM BENEATH THE RING AND HE HAS A CHAIR!!! CHAOS SLIDES INTO THE RING AND STANDS OVER SUICIDE’s BODY!!”
DOE: “They should do more thorough ring checks before we go live.”
GHEORGHE: “CHAOS IS NOW BEATING SUICIDE WITH THE CHAIR!! THIS IS TOTALLY UNCALLED FOR!! SUICIDE CANNOT EVEN DEFEND HIMSELF!”
JIVE: “Hit him a few times for me!”
GHEORGHE: “CHAOS DRIVING THE CHAIR INTO THE HEAD OF SUICIDE AND HERE COME OFFICIALS TO TRY TO END THIS ASSAULT!”
(Officials flood the ring and manage to wrangle the chair away from Chaos who spits on Suicide’s body.)
GHEORGHE: “And now Chaos spitting on Suicide as he’s ushered out of the ring! What disrespect! I can already sense that this will be settled at the pay per view.”
DOE: “I don’t think this can be settled for a long time, Tom.”
JIVE: “Chaos sent a message to Suicide tonight ..”
GHEORGHE: “Ladies and gentlemen, I am lost for words .. we have to go to commercial .. but when we come back … PETER FILE and JONATHAN MARX take on EL ARCO IRIS and the World Heavyweight Champion LARRY TACT in a tag team match where the winner gets a WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP SHOT!”
