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Joe the Plumber (Updated 09/28/08)


League Member
Jan 1, 2000

Name: Devin Woods
Email Address: originaldwoods@hotmail.com
AIM/Yahoo Messenger: twesean (AIM)
Preferred Method of Handling: Don't have one.
Best Way to Contact you: PM


Name: Joe the Plumber (born Joseph Theodore Plummer)
Nicknames: JTP, the Sucka-Free Bouse, the Greasy Goblin, the Workin' Man, the Gristly Beast, the Filth Fiend, the Grittiest Son of a B*tch Walkin' the Face of the Earth, the Seeker of Unwarranted Revenge, the Man That Unclogs Your Toilet

Height: 6'1½"
Weight: 265 lbs.
Handedness: Right
Looks: Shoulder-length brown hair that is visibly thinning and always messy, unwashed, and matted down with sweat. Bushy 'crazy man' eyebrows (he needs a comb for them they're so wiiild). A face which is simian in nature and much too big for his body, eccentuated by an unkempt and out-of-control full beard. His body can be described as stout, burly, pair-shaped, and excessively hairy—'bingo wing' arms and a beer belly complete the package.

Hailing From: Grew up in Bed-Stuy, Do-or-Die, in Brooklyn, New York. Spent several years in Queens, but recently had his house demolished by order of the city, forcing him out onto the street. (To be fair, it was ready to fall down anyway.)

Disposition: Mean, nasty, twisted, malicious, jaded, embittered, pissed off, borderline insane at times when cutting promos high on crystal meth—to put it in simple terms, he's as offensive and as repugnant a human being as one could possibly be.
Gimmick: A deranged, crack-smoking plumber with a penchant for anal sex with big-butted women. Mmmmhmmmmm.

Trademark Quotes:



[Joe tends to speak in third person from time to time, referring to himself as "Ol' Joe"]

Ring Attire: Unwashed coveralls marked by various stains, black combat boots, no shirt underneath. An old beige hat that has the amateurish logo of his plumbing services company embroidered on its front. His middle and ring fingers on his left hand are duck taped together. When Joe does wear a shirt, it's most often one he picked up at a second-hand store, or his one and only piece of merchandise, inspired by Old Dirty Bastard:


Goes on the front of a plain white T-shirt… Joe's ugly mug smack dab in the centre. "Joe the Plumber" wraps around the outside in place of "Ol' Dirty Bastard RIP", with his various nicknames taking the place of ODB's on the inner circle. Chyeah, boi.

Theme Music: "Dog Sh*t" by Ol' Dirty Bastard (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GoZU9H4Ry8&feature=related)
Ring Entrance: The lights go down as the sound of dogs barking and snarling begins to flood the P.A. system. Joe the Plumber pushes through the curtain, walks from one side of the stage to the other, giving his trademark "UGHNNNNNNNN!" (which the fans respond back with), before walking down the ramp way to the ring. Once inside, he just sort of chills. It's stupid to expend energy climbing ropes or posing, especially when you're Joe, and your conditioning is questionable at best.

Tactics/Style: Anything-Goes Brawler; Joe doesn't subscribe to just one wrestling style. He's by no means a high flyer or anything like that, but he's more than just a brawler. Scrapping is what he excels at, but he'd just as soon do a running somersault off the apron and land on your face. One thing is certain, you DON'T want to be anywhere near Joe when he grabs his trademark plunger, or the birthplace of AIDS as it is known in some circles. Once he has it in his hands, you're sure to have it in your face, so RUN, B*TCH, RUNNN!

Strengths: Toughness: No one's tougher than Joe the Plumber. He's as durable as they come. He will not tap out. And blood serves only to piss him off and rile him up.

Momentum: The psychological advantage JTP has over the majority of his opponents is great, seeing as he's the longest-reigning (and possibly the most dominant) champion in NFW history. His trash-talking skills are unmatched as well. Very few people can go toe-to-toe with him in a war of words. Whether inside the squared circle or in front of the interviewer's camera, it's hard to keep your confidence in check when your opponent is the Greasy Goblin.

Scrapper: Joe will do ANYTHING if it means keeping the momentum or swinging it back in his favour. Staying injury-free is not high on his list of priorities. He also loves to fight. You’d be very wise not to let the match deteriorate into a brawl.

Weaknesses: Poor Conditioning: Drugs and alcohol play hell on a person's body, and there's no denying that Joe partakes excessively in both.

Loss of Focus: Joe's an emotional person as it pertains to competition, and thus can be easily thrown off his game by the right person.

Impairment: As stated above, he's usually on drugs when he's wrestling, which can tend to slow him down and impede his judgement. Mistakes will and have been made.


NFW Championships: NFW World Television Title (current champion—won at Wrestlebowl 2 on April 15th, 2007)
NFW Awards: 2008 Wrestler of the Mid-Year, 2008 RP of the Mid-Year, 2008 Feud of the Mid-Year, 2008 Match of the Mid-Year (TV Title Battle Royale at WrestleStock II)


The Moves: Eye gouges, fishhooks, bionic elbows, headlocks, haymakers, bootscrapes, running somersault off the apron, DVD, Blue Thunder Powerbomb, Kiss The Porcelain (With his opponent knelt facing the corner, he charges from the opposite corner and delivers a knee strike to the back of their head, causing their face to smash into the middle turnbuckle), The Great Flood (Suspended Ace Crusher AKA Nigel Mcguinness' Tower of London)


Sh*t River Plunge (Tiger Driver AKA Ahmed Johnson's Pearl River Plunge)

Volcano Tribute Splash (VTS) (Snuka Splash, with Joe gazing skyward, as he stands perched on the top rope, and screaming "VOLCAAANNNOOOOOO!" just prior to making the leap of faith. Volcano was his childhood dog.) [RARE!]


Another time.
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