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Oh, You So Old ...


Bull On Parade
Jan 1, 2000
(The camera opens to a large sunflare. It turns to the right and focuses on a sign with a large "?" on it, and the words "Tourist Information" written below. The view switches to the inside of the building, where STEVE RADDER is standing at a desk, chatting with the girl behind it.)

STEVE RADDER : ... so I said to him ...

(RADDER hears the cameraman behind him, and turn to look.)

STEVE RADDER : Ah .. you're here! Excellent. I hear I've got a lot to talk about.

(The camera stays still.)

STEVE RADDER : Oh boy. You CSWA camera guys, you're sure a talkative bunch. Hey! Did you know that Sweetwater, TX is home to the southwest's largest "Assisted Living" complex? No doubt. I got a brochure ... thought I'd give it to GUNS. He seems to have his panties in a helluva big knot lately ... maybe he just needs someone to help him with the can opener.

(RADDER nods and smiles.)

STEVE RADDER : But hey, the GUNS jokes are fun and all, and I mean, well ... POOP ... dude was around when the pyramids were being built and all.

(RADDER laughs, a large grin breaking out on his face.)

STEVE RADDER : Damn, I'm sorry - there was TWO GUNS jokes in there, weren't there? Well, enough of that. Seriously, though, B.B. - you just got whopped by Kevin Powers. Kevin Powers! One of those so-called mid-card losers who no-one wants to pay attention to, right? What's that say about you? And what's that say about you running your mouth off to anyone who will listen to about the unworthiness of the former PLR - when you got beat by one, and you're well on your way to getting beat by another, if you keep this crap up. Keep this in mind, B.B., at ELVIS LIVES, I beat Powers, who mopped the floor with you. Watch your mouth, old man.

(Throughout the rant, the grin turned upside down - RADDER promptly turns it back up.)

STEVE RADDER : But hey, KP, my old running mate. It's the first time we've gotten in the ring since ELVIS LIVES. Your chance for redemption, and hell, my chance to get in the ring with you and your supposedly deaf-mute pal. Hey, buddy! Logan! Speak up, or are you too afraid, what with runnin' with the big boys now and all? It's OK. I understand. Behind all his joking and calling me names, ol' Double G Kevin Powers isn't looking forward to the Big Show anymore than you are. Maybe you two can hold eachother. You know, strength in numbers. I'm comin' for you boys, GXW or no ... you're in the way of that Radder Express ... the one heading straight ... BACK ... to the top.

(RADDER laughs and tosses the brochures at the camera.)

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