(Cue up "Hero" by Ministry.)
(Fade into the Jobber's Whitelandia compound. Cut to the rec room where the Jobber sits amoung a variety of fitness equipment.)
The Jobber: I could sit here acting like I was training, as if the 3 seconds of footage of me running, punching or lifting was going to be the difference in this matchup.
But I'm not a delusional twit, so I don't think I will.
Scotty Sanders on the other hand seems to be. So you are undefeated? You will make my career if I beat you? I will become one of the wrestling legends if I only pin your shoulders to the mat? Oh goody goody gum drops, I sure will try really hard to win this match now! I'm sure it will be a hard fought fairly won contest! Yeah...
Scotty Sanders, you seem to be a bit confused. You are not a legend, you are not important, you are not semi important, you are simply NOTHING. It isn't difficult to be undefeated when you are an unimportant peon who hasn't fought anyone of any significant ability. And it isn't difficult to get a swelled head when you are a worthless peon. If you did grow a large ego from your meager accomplishments then my good boy, I would have to think you an even larger moron than I now think. The man who has accomplished nothing doesn't have an ego. Would you like a medal? I mean is there any more down to earth person than Scotty Sanders, the man who thinks he is a career making legend? I can't think of anyone!
Oh... wait.
I'm not exactly sure how you managed to be even less intelligent than you are talented or interesting, but you did prove it this time. I'm not sure if you intended to intimidate me, or make me giggle like a school girl, but you have managed to do both.
I'm sure you are all wondering what I mean by that, so let me explain. While I do think it is funny that Scotty Sanders actually thinks he is important, and beyond that he thinks he can beat me, but there is a more disturbing side to it. As we all know metal re... ly challanged people can suddenly display immense strength. This ta... special people power could be an advantage for Scotty Sanders in this match, so I'll have to off set that with some stuffed animal or other toy to amuse his juvenile mind. Not the most intricate plan, I know but we can't confuse the little tyke, can we?
Scotty, one of these days I'll find out what drugs you are doing to put you in this odd state of mind, but until then I guess I will have to settle for you being a tiny baby step back up the ladder. Hopefully GLCW will not insult me in my next match with such an under developed opponent. I'm somewhat sorry that I will have to injure someone in your mental state, but your laughable boasts have annoyed me a bit, and frankly I'm just sick of not being taken seriously. So if I have to further handicap a handicapped person to get a real challenge, so be it.
(Fade out)