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That's Amore


New member
Jul 8, 1998
Sierra Vista, Arizona
(As the scene opens up the shot shows the outside of ‘Good God’ Kevin Powers’s home in Chicago, Illinois. Capturing the scenery of the shot, the picture quickly flashes out and flashes inside to what is Powers recreation room. On the wall are several news clippings, awards, and other celebrity pictures as well as trophy cases that show the numerous titles he has won in the past. With the camera continuing to pan right taking in all the different memorabilia, the picture finally sets on Powers who is looking at a picture of what he considered the Grandfather of Lush the late and great Dean Martin. With a beer in his hand he looks at the picture and begins to sing.)

KP: When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore ...

Dean, Dean, Dean. What am I going to do man? I've got haters to the left of me and haters to the right. They don't understand people like us now do they. It's people like us that go out there and entertain day after day ... night after night ... and what do we get for it? Ridicule. They don't appreciate you delivering your tones of soothing singing and I administering powerful beatings. You're my idol Dean, but I need to draw inspiration from another avenue. I need something to remind me that when I go out there I mean business. I need something ... like ...

(Powers takes his eyes off of the Dean Martin picture and looks across the desk at a smaller picture of Ike Turner. Closing his eyes he begins to chant to himself.)

KP: Release your Inner-Ike. Release your Inner-Ike.

(Powers then opens his eyes and looks directly at the camera.)

KP: (singing) Everybody needs somebody sometime when you're feeling blue ...

That's right kids. Normally I would be kickin' it with some haunting tunes from ICP, but there are those times I need to relax and go back to the old school beat. Now to some of you freaks when I mention the old school beat you might actually think I'm talking about that plastic surgery reject from the Planet of the Apes that Shamon likes to prance around like very chance he gets, but I'm not one to judge ...

Who am I kidding? Yes I am!

Now I heard Shamon say some harsh things about The Double G KP as well as adjust himself to hit each and every single off-key note known to man and animal. It's bad enough that he actually admits he'll be the best Monica Lewinsky intern that President Mayfield ever had, but to actually come out and say that he's got a chance? How much of that gheri-curl did you actually drink?

You might have a chance at the IHOP. You might have a chance at a karaoke competition. Hell, you might even have a chance to become Michael's new chimp Bubbles II, but against me? In the ring? Heck no you ain't got no chance! Maybe you're just delusional. Maybe you just got a one-track mind. Maybe you're just happy you made your mother proud and became the daughter she always wanted, but what you BETTER understand is that you are just the first step in my route back up the success ladder. And another thing ...

(Suddenly the phone rings off to the side interrupting Powers during his promo. Looking at it with disgust he just shakes his head and looks back at the camera.)

KP: Ah don't mind that. The answering machine will pick it up. Now like I was saying ...

(The phone stops ringing and the answering machine does, in fact, pick up. Once the tone beeps two females can be heard on the other end.)

Woman: Hey Kevin. Sorry we couldn't catch you at home ...

(Looking towards the phone Powers only smiles.)

KP: Ah my adoring fans. See? People still respect me.

(Powers looks on as the message continues and he realizes he recognize the voices. They are none other than Gina and Susan from his past.)

G: We just wanted to let you know that we're still thinking about you Kevin.

S: And we wanted to let you know that we're thinking about your match against Shamon at On Time.

(Smiling Powers thumbs at the phone and looks at the camera.)

KP: That's my girls. They're the best!

G & S: (Yelling) We think that you suck and Shamon is gonna kick your sorry ass!

(Both ladies laughing, they hang up the phone and the answering machine clicks off. His smile turning to a angered frown, Powers closes his eyes again and begins to chant to himself once more.)

KP: Inner-Ike ... Inner-Ike ... Inner-Ike ...

(Powers then opens his eyes and points at the camera.)

KP: Don't mind those two bimbos cause they're obviously trying to get back on the Lushwagon cause they KNOW they got Powers Envy just like that 'Let's Get Physical' reject Shamon does!

Boy, I don't know who you're trying to fool, but at On Time I can honestly say I will be mopping the canvas with you. You'll come in, do your little dance, sit down in your little chair and reach up trying to grab at a cord so that water can pour over your body, but the ONLY thing you're gonna get is a huge dose of USDA Grade A PRIME ass kickin'! I'll beat you down by eight and have your momma by nine and when she gets a ride on the BLT she'll call you the next day trying to get my number. Damn shame you won't be able to tell her anything since you'll be too busy trying to remove the size fifteen boot out of your mouth.

Get ready to have that activator in your hair cause after I'm done making you Kiss the Canvas I'm gonna wipe my boots on your head so I can have that crystal clear polish walking back up the rampway, but hey ... that ain't my problem ..


(Powers looks back at the picture of Ike Turner on the desk and says something to it while giving the picture a thumbs up.)

KP: Ain't that right Ike.


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