Wrestlemania Guesses

[WEAVER]

Well, it's always interesting to se how my guesses turn out compared to what the WWF bookers have planned...

With that in mind... feel free to comment on why you think I'm on the money or completely nuts.

(If it's a completely nuts comment... Gemini wrote it. )

Edge vs Booker T... talk about your last minute match up. I say Booker T on this one because the WWF brass are kind of pleased with Bookers work effort and they'd kind of like to set up a feud where Edge may actually get over. (Because as near as I can tell he sure as hell isn't over now.)

Kane vs Kurt Angle... Kane all the way here. He's got zero heat coming into this matchup, which means Angles toast. Yeah, that's not how we do it. Yeah it doesn't make any sense, but what do we know? (Stupid freakin' McMahons.)

Lita vs Jazz vs Trish... Trish, the hometown girl gets this one by hook or by crook. Gotta send those marks home happy. (On that note, maybe Edge will win... but he shouldn't.) As for Jazz... maybe she can hook up with Rhino and go off and have little manbeasts. Jazz. shudder.

Chuck and Billy, the Accolytes, the Hardyz and the Dudley Boyz. Chuck and Billy keep the belts because Vince McMahon likes to make us watch things we hate. (Don't believe me? What was that whole XFL thing?)

Ric Flair vs The UnderTaker... Calloway all the way. The Dead Man has never lost a match at wrestlemania ever and I don't expect him to start now. Should be a decent but not great matchup.

William Regal vs Rob Van Damm... I have a strong feeling this could be the match of the card. Don't ask me why. RVD should take this in what should be a great match but might absolutely suck.

SCSA vs Scott Hall... SCSA is going to beat the living %^$& out of Hall. That said he may go for a pin at some point and win the match. I strongly suspect this may go to a double countout or DQ or something ridiculous, but I think the Rattlesnake will probobly win this somehow.

HHH vs Jericho... I think the WWF is gonna keep on pushing Jericho... so the kid from Winnipeg gets the duke. They haven't shown any inclination to take that belt off of Jericho up til now, but who knows. I'm picking Jericho, because up it's actually a smart choice.

Rock vs Hogan... Hogan has two years left and he plans to retire. Plus, McMahon has been DYING for the chance to watch Hogan swallow his pride. Rocky by a mile. This may actually be an unbelieveable asskicking but I don't think anybody involved in the match is quite that dumb.

Random Thoughts...

Taker vs Flair. Why?

When in the hell is the WWF going to start pushing Al Snow?

Isn't Regal gonna have to come up big just to keep up with RVD?

Are there gonna be any mystery guests? (Please, please, please be Scott Steiner!)

Does this wrestlemania have the chance to be the most sucktacular ever?

Don't you wish you could watch Genesis instead?

Erik, you want to get on that?

Nuff said... I have writing to do.

Scotty/Gemini

 

[SFZero]

Booker T vs. Edge:
It sure would be nice if both these guys were in other matches and won, letting them both get a push, but that doesn't seem like it's gonna happen. God knows we don't need fresh main event talent when we can see another Rock promo or a "Beautiful Day" video. My guess is Edge wins it to go on for a two week push before he disappears into obscurity again.

Kane vs. Angle:
Wow. This doesn't reek of randomness. It's almost as bad as "Jericho-spills-coffee-on-Kane" from the "build-up" to Kane and Jericho's Last Man Standing match a while back. My only question is: who cares? Not I. Angle is entertaining only when he has things to play off of, and Kane isn't exactly a chatterbox. I'm gonna guess that Angle wins if only to get him out of this undercard hellhole he's in now.

Lita vs. Jazz vs. Trish:
Is it just me or are Lita and the Hardy Boyz boring as hell nowadays? Ever since the feud with E&C ended, I really couldn't have cared less about the antics of Team X-Treme. And Lita is seriously beating a dead horse. She stopped being dynamic a LONG time ago. Hell, I'm not even sure who the champion is in this match. What does that tell you? That and the fact that...and this may shock you, people...DDP is the European Champion. WHEN THE F*** DID THAT HAPPEN?!? I've never seen him with the belt. Hell, I've never seen HIM for the last couple months. The WWF wastes its champions unless you're Austin, Rock, or Triple H. It's really getting depressing. Also, who the hell is the Lightheavyweight Champion? IS there a Lightheavyweight Champion? When the hell are they going to drop that ridiculous name and call it the Cruiserweight Champion? Oh, and Trish wins.

Chuck/Billy vs. Acolytes vs. Hardyz vs. Dudleys:
(snore)Oh, excuse me, I was not caring about this utterly retarded match. Chuck and Billy get a lot of heat for their angle, but hell, I say if it's different, it's good. (Exhibit A: Goldust) Sometimes breaking the monotony of WWF programming is all it takes to get a gold star in my book. Look for Chuck/Billy to retain simply because no one gives a f*** about the Hardyz or the Dudleys anymore. And the Acolytes never had a snowball's chance in hell.

Ric Flair vs. The Undertaker:
Wow, this is ironic. The match that has intrigued me the most through build-up is the one that features two of the most boring ring workers in the business today. Woo! Unless 'Taker goes goth, David Flair hits his father with a chair, and Sting drops from the ceiling, this will be a snore-fest. 'Taker will win after some McMahon interference, setting up the roster split.

William Regal vs. RVD:
I really feel sorry for both of these guys. Both of them are entertaining as hell in and out of the ring, what with Regal's old-school heel technical style and English antics, and RVD's insane uncategorizable style and stoner antics. RVD wins a match that no one will remember by around SummerSlam.

Stone Cold vs. Scott Hall:
I hate to say it, but this match really has me slightly excited. Which is about as excited as I get with wrestling nowadays. I would really like to see Scott Hall get the duke over Austin, maybe with help from Kevin Nash, cause God knows he has nothing better to do except crying in the locker-room during WM, thus extending the nWo/Austin feud. However, Austin will probably win and then drink beer.

Jericho vs. HHH:
Why, why, why, why, why, WHY is the Unified World Title match being billed UNDER a regular singles match? What the crap? That really just kills the heat and makes me not give a frag about this match at all. It's really depressing when the WWF doesn't even try and hide the fact that they don't have faith in their champion. HHH wins it and goes on to more beautiful days. Hopefully Jericho will lose the ponytail, psychadelic pants, and the hosebeast and become Y2J again.

Hogan vs. Rock:
"I'm gonna lay the smackdown on his crippled ass!" "I'm gonna lay the smackdown on his crippled ass!" "I'm gonna lay the smackdown on his crippled ass!" "I'm gonna lay the smackdown on his crippled ass!" That line would have been mildly amusing if Hogan hadn't said it seven times in succession the night they hit the Rock with a bus or whatever. I understand the ramifications of this match, old school vs. new school, but seriously, it should not be billed over the World Title. That's just ridiculous. Rock'll win, so Vince can go "tee hee." End of story.

Random thoughts:

Why does WM suck so much this year? Addendum: why have the past TWO Wrestlemania's pretty much blown ass? WM2K was probably about as good as we're ever gonna get, what with the Fatal Four Way with Foley, the first ever ladder match between the three tag teams, Angle vs. Benoit vs. Jericho (drool), and all sorts of tomfoolery. Ergo, WM sucks this year. I wouldn't buy it unless there was a "Booker Battle Royale" where they all died. Except Paul Heyman. Poor guy. I bet he's crying on Tazz's shoulder right about now before they go off to commit suicide together.

Is there room for one more, Paul?

-JP

 

[EZieba]

Oh I'm gonna post my guesses later, but ... just this one small thing.

At least you people will get to WATCH WM-18!!!!!

You're not stuck in SK wondering when you get the !@$%# OUT!

Whew ... I DO feel better ...

Liar

Z

PS - Ric Flair vs. The Undertaker - Snorefest? You're kidding right?

 

[EZieba]

Booker T vs. Edge:
Okay here's something. Since being in the federation Booker T has been treated like a Red Headed Stepchild by both Austin and Rock. When push comes to shove Booker T has been treated like a little school girl. Edge has been on and off for the longest time so I don't expect him to walk out of here with the win. Booker T gets the pin.

Kane vs. Angle:
Granted I had to read about it, but how would you feel if the guy with the burnt body gimmick was the one who won The Weakest Link and you had to wrestle him? Personally, from what I have seen, Angle has BEEN to the mountain again and again MANY times. Kane, on the other hand, really hasn't. Still, don't forget that Kane tends to shine at WM ... I'm picking Kane.

Lita vs. Jazz vs. Trish:
First ... isn't Tajiri the cruiser champ? Second ... didn't Lita just get introduced into this angle? Third ... I do enjoy ladies' wrestling (one of the few), but I also know that, since Moolah, the title doesn't exactly stay secure on a woman's waist (unless you are Sable and Chyna ... then you can see your title reign from the OUTSIDE of the arena). I'm expecting the title to change here and I expect it to go on the woman with Stratusfaction!

Chuck/Billy vs. Acolytes vs. Hardyz vs. Dudleys:
The 'close' friends vs Team once-was-x-treme vs Duds vs THE TEAM THAT IS DUE ... The Acolytes. Past their prime? Are you kidding? They are FAR from that! If Chuck and Billy win it then it was a tongue and cheek match ... otherwise I'm pickin' The APA!

Ric Flair vs. The Undertaker:
How can ANYONE say that these two, the two best personas in the ring bar none, will be a snorefest is BEYOND ME! You can say what you want about wrestling TODAY, but let's remember who paved that road and it starts with these two. If ANYTHING this should be an interesting match-up and, I DARE SAY, UT winning streak will finally come to an end with THE MAN Ric WOOO BY GOD FLAIR getting the win!

William Regal vs. RVD:
Mr. PPV? HA! I heard about this one already and that's the one I would've picked. RVD is your NEW IC CHAMPION!

I'll have to pick up on this in a little bit cause I just found out I have something ELSE to write

Z

 

[SFZero]

I never said that Ric Flair and the Undertaker themselves were boring, they just blow goats in the ring. It's like the immovable object versus...another immovable object.

-JP

 

[youknowwho]

Here are my predictions:

RVD beats Regal for IC
Angle beats Kane
Billy and Chuck retain
Rock pins Hogan
Edge beats Booker
Taker beats Flair
Austin beats Hall
Jazz retains
MAven loses to Spike initially but then he loses to Hurricane, who loses to Molly, who loses to Christian, who loses to Maven again.
HHH wins World.

I'm usually pretty good at this so I thought I'd give it a shot. Does the person with the most accurate predictions still get $1,000 cash?

 

[WEAVER]

Shaddap.

Scotty/Gemini

(On a side note, I don't think that anyone would have guessed that SCSA would have thrown a hissy fit and quit right after wrestlemania. Did anyone see that one coming?)

 

[youknowwho]

Nah, I didn't see that one coming either.

Damn you Vince you made me the biggest star in the business and pushed me through the roof since 1996!! Somehow...I'll make you pay!!! I quit!

Whiner.

Dave