WRESTLEVERSE II: "The Phenom" Shawn Hart (c) vs. "Da Bomb" Mike Evers - TV Title
- Thread starter DBrunkGXW
- Start date
ShawnHartXXX
The Phenom
Numer Uno
FADE IN: To a giant mural featuring an artistic rendering of SHAWN JESSICA HART, PhD. standing atop the rotting corpse of 'Da Bomb' Mike Evers with his EPW Television title held to the sky. Standing before the mural is the man in the flesh with the actual TV title strapped around his bare waist.
HART: "Michaelangelo, Leonardo, Raphael... NONE OF THEM could possibly create a thing of beauty such as this..."
He pulls a man purse from off-camera and withdraws from it a pair of women's reading glasses. After putting them on his face and adjusting them on his nose, he moves in for a closer look at the mural.
HART: "...Come to think of it, either could Donatello, Baxter Stockman, the Rat King or even the grand sensei SPLINTER! Indeed, the greatness of the Prime Minister of Gettin' Sinister is something that can't be found anywhere else on the planet. Believe me, I've seen the pyramids in Egypt, the Eiffel Tower in France, the Double D's on Jenna Jameson... and NONE OF IT brings the JIGGY to the table like the TV Champ!"
He nods his head in self-agreement.
HART: "This was evident, Mr. Evers, the last time we went toe-toe-toe and I utterly humiliated you en route to taking said television title. It was like the Bengals versus the Cleveland Browns, and I was Carson Palmer throwing for 3 touchdowns in a 30-not rout. And yet, here we are on the eve of the Empire's second offering of WRESTLEVERSE, and the powers that be have elected to go once more 'round the track..."
This time, the head is shaken in disgust and disbelief.
HART: "Hell, one week I'm TOTALLY disregarded and left off of the show, the next I'm given an inferior opponent. With all the utter mistreatment this place has been giving me, I'm wondering if I should even bother showing up."
The Phenom chuckles to himself.
HART: "But then where would that leave all of YOU, my adoring masses?! The millions...er... DOZENS of Hart-broken JIGG-A-MANIACS that DEMAND my unique brand of entertainment week in and week out! If not for my match, they'd be stuck with Boy Troy and her Boy Troy, a couple faux Phenoms and the ever-declining Ninja K wrestling a girl. And so it is, with a heavy heart... and a bad case of indigestion that SJH has decided to SACK UP and get back on that saddle, DESPITE the fact that the disrespect for who I am and what I've accomplished continues to run rampant!"
He takes on last look at the painting before returning his hot pink glasses to the pouch from whence they come.
HART: "Mike Evers, I came into Empire Pro with an admiration for what you had done. I guess it's only fitting that you're labeled "Da Bomb", cuz when I finally saw you up close and personal... you BOMBED it like one would not believe... and all that admiration went down the tubes like my last bowel movement! That bein' the steak n' eggs of the situation, when we step into that ol' squared circle on P-P-V, I'm gonna be droppin' some BOMBS of my own on your sorry, WANKER ass... and that's not just the indigestion talking! Call it an outrage, call it a MOCKERY, my Magic 8-ball calls it the TRUTH! You digs?"
Hart shoots an inquisitive look toward the camera.
HART: "Looks like this title reign is gonna be one for the ages. The PHENOM has left the building!!!"
FADE OUT
FADE IN: To a giant mural featuring an artistic rendering of SHAWN JESSICA HART, PhD. standing atop the rotting corpse of 'Da Bomb' Mike Evers with his EPW Television title held to the sky. Standing before the mural is the man in the flesh with the actual TV title strapped around his bare waist.
HART: "Michaelangelo, Leonardo, Raphael... NONE OF THEM could possibly create a thing of beauty such as this..."
He pulls a man purse from off-camera and withdraws from it a pair of women's reading glasses. After putting them on his face and adjusting them on his nose, he moves in for a closer look at the mural.
HART: "...Come to think of it, either could Donatello, Baxter Stockman, the Rat King or even the grand sensei SPLINTER! Indeed, the greatness of the Prime Minister of Gettin' Sinister is something that can't be found anywhere else on the planet. Believe me, I've seen the pyramids in Egypt, the Eiffel Tower in France, the Double D's on Jenna Jameson... and NONE OF IT brings the JIGGY to the table like the TV Champ!"
He nods his head in self-agreement.
HART: "This was evident, Mr. Evers, the last time we went toe-toe-toe and I utterly humiliated you en route to taking said television title. It was like the Bengals versus the Cleveland Browns, and I was Carson Palmer throwing for 3 touchdowns in a 30-not rout. And yet, here we are on the eve of the Empire's second offering of WRESTLEVERSE, and the powers that be have elected to go once more 'round the track..."
This time, the head is shaken in disgust and disbelief.
HART: "Hell, one week I'm TOTALLY disregarded and left off of the show, the next I'm given an inferior opponent. With all the utter mistreatment this place has been giving me, I'm wondering if I should even bother showing up."
The Phenom chuckles to himself.
HART: "But then where would that leave all of YOU, my adoring masses?! The millions...er... DOZENS of Hart-broken JIGG-A-MANIACS that DEMAND my unique brand of entertainment week in and week out! If not for my match, they'd be stuck with Boy Troy and her Boy Troy, a couple faux Phenoms and the ever-declining Ninja K wrestling a girl. And so it is, with a heavy heart... and a bad case of indigestion that SJH has decided to SACK UP and get back on that saddle, DESPITE the fact that the disrespect for who I am and what I've accomplished continues to run rampant!"
He takes on last look at the painting before returning his hot pink glasses to the pouch from whence they come.
HART: "Mike Evers, I came into Empire Pro with an admiration for what you had done. I guess it's only fitting that you're labeled "Da Bomb", cuz when I finally saw you up close and personal... you BOMBED it like one would not believe... and all that admiration went down the tubes like my last bowel movement! That bein' the steak n' eggs of the situation, when we step into that ol' squared circle on P-P-V, I'm gonna be droppin' some BOMBS of my own on your sorry, WANKER ass... and that's not just the indigestion talking! Call it an outrage, call it a MOCKERY, my Magic 8-ball calls it the TRUTH! You digs?"
Hart shoots an inquisitive look toward the camera.
HART: "Looks like this title reign is gonna be one for the ages. The PHENOM has left the building!!!"
FADE OUT