Re: Week 3 (New Year's) - El Gordo Grande v. Shorty
We are live at LVW's New Year Show, with the crowd whooping it up, looking forward to some insane matches. Yeah, amidst all this hype, the lights dim, and the TitanTron (or whatever we call that big screen at the ramp area; we must have one, right?) lights up, revealing a scene that is marked "Last Night."
The camera is now trained on a busy Las Vegas scene, shined brightly by streetlights and a full moon. Tall buildings line up next to sidewalks. The camera swings over between two buildings, and suddenly darkens, as it's facing an alleyway. A bright green dumpster can be seen vaguely, as can a dark in this alley. The camera zooms in, to reveal the shadow as a short African-American male, wearing a blue basketball jersey and jean shorts. As the camera centers its focus on him, he begins to speak.
"Yo dawgs. The name's Shorty. Yeah, I'm the new guy in LVW, and tonight, I'm rarin' to show ya'll what I'm made of."
With this, Shorty back towards the wall of the alley.
"Now, I've been watchin' the first couple o' weeks of this show. I've seen some interestin' things, no doubt. But still, I kept tellin' myself at the end, 'Shorty dawg, there's somethin' missin'. I thought 'bout it for awhile now, but 'twasn't till two nights ago that I figured out what that missin' link was."
Shorty, whose back was facing the camera, now turns around towards the camera again. There is a disgusted look on his face.
"Oh, yeah, it was ratha obvious, now wasn't it? I mean, look at that damn rosta. We've got an internet impersonata, fake zombies, cowboys... This place is a dump, made up of all the misfits management could find. I mean, this place is supposed to be 'Takin' it to the obscene.' It ain't doin' that; instead, it's 'Takin' it to hell.'"
Shorty walks forward now, towards the open road ahead of him, his neckalace whipping around at the front of his neck.
"An' when I figured out what was wrong, I knew that only I could fix up this sh!t. I mean, I'm Fly, dawgs. Flya than anyone of 'em backstage, wonderin' how much weirda they can be. I'm a gangsta; I'm the symbol of what's right, and they're just the opposite of that. It's time to bring LVW out of the cellar of stupidity, and I'm gonna f*ckin' go out and do that."
"Right, so tonight, I'm startin' up 'gainst an obese wannabe Luchador, by the name of El Gordo Grande. Look man, I haven't wrestled here yet, but the talent must be thin in Las Vegas if you're still 'round afta two weeks. I guess the sayin's true; 'Third time's the charm.' In this case, the third time ya get yo' ovagrown @ss to the ring, ya won't be gettin' up off of it."
"Yeah, it seems like the road to the LVW World Championship will be an easy one. It's got some obstacles in the form of 250+ poundas, but they're really quite puny. All I gotta do is stomp on 'em, and when I do, they'll crumble. LVW's goin' Gangsta, foo's."
With that Shorty walks out of the alley, a smirk on his face, as the scene fades, and LVW gets to a commercial break.